


Seoul Moon

by ShineYunhyeong21



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Director Hanbin, Drinking, FamousAU, Junhoe and Hanbin are only extras, M/M, Model Yunhyeong, Rapper Bobby, Sing Junhoe, brokenhearted, need more yunbob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-13 21:52:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16026698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShineYunhyeong21/pseuds/ShineYunhyeong21
Summary: Tonight's Moon looks so very desolate. You too must live clenching an empty heart.- The Moon of Seoul by Kim GunmoakaWhat happens when neither knows how to truly love the other.





	Seoul Moon

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this months ago, and just decided to finish it. 
> 
> Uh, yeah, well that's really all there is to it. I also think that there should be more yunbob because the ship is there and it slowly but surely sailing. I hope whoever reads this enjoys it.

Throwing back the drink in my hand, I clamed my nerves as it never gets easier. How can it when I’m all everyone talks about? I didn’t sign up for this, but my opinion doesn’t matter, it never did. Entering the room filled with people that were out to get me, I took my seat in the front row ignoring the looks and whispers of those around me. It was my job to be here and I wasn’t going to let these ignorant people run me away from my responsibilities. The lights dimmed causing the room to be incased in pure darkness before the strip of white tile that ran down the middle of the room was being lit up by the spotlights on the ceiling. A heavily bass boosted club song started to play as one-by-one the models entered with stoic expressions, and even though I didn’t want to admit it, I longed to be where they are once more. Glittery outfits, gothic/emo inspired outfits, outrageous jewelry, colorful outfits, it was everything that the fashion show was supposed to have. Models with similar features wore the outfits as if they were everyday clothing causing others to whisper to one another about what pieces they liked and didn’t like.

“Hey!” Hearing the screaming in my ear, I leaned over not even caring to find out who it was. “The designer wants to see you.”

“Why?” Finally turning, I saw one of the stylists and after looking at their expression I stood following behind her.

Walking in front of others who were invested in the show, I tried my hardest not to make eye-contact with them because I knew that it would lead to another rumor. Rolling my eyes, I was glad that we had made it backstage without any problems. My wrist was grabbed as I was being dragged in the opposite direction of where the stylist was headed causing me to look around confused. I was pushed into a chair as people started to take off the jewelry and makeup that I had put on before arriving as they started to do their own thing.

“Oh, you’re already getting ready; good. I want you to be the last model, and seeing as how we’ve worked together before I know that I can count on you.” Hiding my surprise, I nodded trying not to show him that I was concerned. “I know what you’re thinking, and I don’t care about what those people have to say. They don’t put money in mine or your pockets, so go out there and show them that you don’t give a damn.”

“Thank you.” He nodded before whispering to a stylist as they ran off somewhere causing him to disappear in the crowd of models that were hurriedly changing for their next strut.

It took a while to get dressed in the most revealing garment that the show had to offer, but I didn’t mind as I worked out for this exact reason. My chest was being covered in sliver glitter that I knew was going to be hard to get off, the extra baggy pants that reminded me of the 90s were the same color as the glitter causing me to look like the tin man. Chuckling at my joke, I bent my head so that they could place the tall faux white bearskin hat on my head. Standing straight once more, the jewelry that hung from the hot dangled in my eyes causing me to blink as it took a while to get used to it. Rushing towards the stage, I waited off to the side as one of the models made her way back and going around here I walked as if I had been in the show the whole time.

Strutting pass those who couldn’t keep my name out of their mouths, I smirked making sure to keep it so that the cameras didn’t miss it. Posing as I came to the end, I spun around walking past the designer as he gave me a thumbs up causing me to give him a smile in return. Heading backstage, I took off the hat ready to get this glitter off so that I could change back into my regular clothing, but that wasn’t the plan as I was being called to go back out onto the stage. Stumbling out, I clapped not even hearing the words that were being said about me but once I drowned out the noise around me I heard nothing but praise.

“I would like to thank Song Yunhyeong once more for being a part of my show last minute, and he was amazing if I should say so myself. A round of applause if you don’t mind.” They clapped for me as I hugged the designer but by the looks on their faces I knew they weren’t happy to do so. “Thank you all for supporting this show, and I hope to see you guys at the next one. Thank you for your time.”

Grabbing my hand, we left the runway together only to be met with fresh faces as they waited for the speech that he was to give them as he always did. Instead of staying to listen, I left asking for some help causing three stylists to come over as they began to wipe the glitter off of me. Staring at myself in the mirror, I decided to keep on the makeup as it wasn’t all that over the top; plus, I was headed straight home anyway. Changing back into the clothes I wore here, I noticed the missed call on my phone and chose to ignore it already knowing what he was going to say – it’s the same thing every time and I fall for it every time.

A small sigh left my lips causing me to mask it with a smile as I said my goodbyes to the other models and designer only to be told that he’d call me tomorrow. Telling him that I’d be waiting, he laughed before dismissing me for real this time. Heading back outside, there were still reports but nothing for me to worry about as they were packing up ready to head home as well. This seemed to be the only time when the world didn’t give a fuck about me. Getting in my brand new car, that the public criticized me for buying, I didn’t turn it on instead closing my eyes as I listened to my phone ring.

I shouldn’t answer it. It’s only him – who is sure to call, again. He knew my schedule as much as he knew his own and we aren’t even together. We’re both just two lonely man-whores in need of filling our empty hearts that can never be filled. Turning off my ringer, I started the car driving in the direction that was opposite from my expensive apartment that he made his own whenever I was overseas.

We belong to each other but at the same time we don’t. We have a relationship but at the same time we don’t. We sleep with each other and we also sleep with other people, only to end up in each other’s arms the next day. We were a mess and that was how we liked it. It was the only way we would work out.

Arriving at the apartment that was equally as expensive as my own, I drove into the carpark with his spare pass making sure that the paparazzi that lurked around didn’t see that it was me. Parking next to his car, that everyone congratulated him on buying, I put on sunglasses to cover the Smokey eye that I had promised myself to take off no less than an hour prior. Getting out, I rushed inside with my phone in hand that showed his name – it was his third time calling since I left the show. Another sigh ran pass my lips but with no one around I didn’t have to conceal it with words or a fake smile.

Pressing in the code, I tossed the door opened before toeing off my shoes only to see that he was playing jazz music loudly while sipping on wine that he didn’t even like. Ending the call at the realization that I was no in front of him, he smiled big and wide making his already prominent jawline stand out even more under the soft glow of the lamps that he had turned on instead of the actual lights. He was always trying to set a mood.

“I knew you’d come.” His voice was deeper and rough causing me to wonder if he had cried before he called me.

Taking an empty glass, I filled it with the wine that he was drinking and sitting in one of the chairs across from the couch he rested on, I took a long sip. The blinds were wide open showing the moon that covered Seoul at this very moment making it look lonely as no stars stood beside it. Pulling off my glasses, I tossed them onto the table that separated us and looking at him, he rested lazily on his hand still smiling at me.

“I read about your latest scandal.” Another sip of this sweet win to break my sentences up for the dramatic effect that he liked so much. “Rapper, Bobby, was seen leaving a club with not one, not two, but three women only for them not to leave until the next morning.”

“I’ve read yours as well.” We both took one more sip – well, mine’s was more of a gulp. “Model, Song Yunhyeong, was seen leaving the apartment complex that Singer, Koo Junhoe, lives in.”

Laughter filled the room covering the music that was conceal it and the fact that there was more than one person inside. We laughed knowing that it didn’t matter, that no of it really mattered. They could say that we were dead and we would still laugh at their foolishness. What they didn’t know is that Junhoe and Bobby used to date, and after breaking up they remained as friends, using Junhoe’s place as the meetup spot. I’m not the only person over there when I do go and I’d never sleep with people I’m close with. I’d rather find a random stranger on the street than do that.

“Why did you call me?” Finishing off my glass, I sat it down on the floor next to my seat and crossing my legs I waited for his laughter to die down.

“I missed you.” The way he had said it held so much hurt that it made my own heart break a little. “I miss you more than I should, Yunhyeong.”

Standing, I headed towards the window and staring at the moon I mentally begged it to give me an answer. He wasn’t supposed to say that - he isn’t supposed to miss me, not even for a second. The arrangement that we made was purely based on the fact that we were both lonely and he knew that better than I did. He was the main one sleeping with others while I did it every so often; he was the one getting on TV shows stating that his ideal type was anyone but me; he was the one who had crushed my fighting spirit from the first time we met, and now he’s the one saying that he missed me.

“The moon looks lonely tonight.” Ignoring his words, I turned leaning against the glass that would needed to be cleaned once morning came. “Don’t you think so?”

Pushing himself up from off of the couch, he turned off one of the lamps causing the others to cast a glow onto the area I had occupied. Looking him over, he was dressed exceptional well from his usual clothing that consisted of designer shirts, hoodies, jeans, and underwear. He wasn’t one to wear a button up, slacks, and dress shoes – but here he is wearing exactly that. his jewelry shined under the glow of the lamps as he stood in front of me, hands in his pockets, and a serious look on his face.

“Yes, it does look lonely. You know it reminds me of you. The lone sheep in a pack of wolves that are ready to tear you apart at any chance they get.” Placing one of his pockets hands by my head, I stared at him in wait for his next words or move. “I want to make sure that you’re never lonely again, but all you know how to do is push me away.”

“Pushing you away?” Biting my lip, I crossed my arms because this worked both ways – I wasn’t the only sheep in this herd. “Then maybe I should leave.”

Walking through the opening he left, I slowly made my way towards the door already knowing that he was going to grab my arm. When he did, he pulled forcing me to spin around and right into his arms leaving me to stare at him in confusion. I expected the grab but not the pull.

Grabbing my arms, he threw them lazily over his shoulder causing me to straighten up as his own snaked around my waist pulling me in even closer. Staring up - a little - at him, I was curious as to what he was doing only for him to start a small two-step to the music that had finally entered my ears again. It seemed like the same song was on repeat because for the next few minutes it was the same singer and all the lyrics held a message of loneliness that we could both agree too. 

“I’ve been chasing after you since we first met almost 7 years ago. We were both immature and on two different career paths – we barely saw each other in the company – and you debuted before I did.” Looking down at his chest, I was conflicted on whether I believed him or not because he picked on me a lot when we were trainees, even though we barely saw each other. “I’m in love with you but you barely acknowledge me. Do you know how crushed I am?”

“What are you trying to gain from this?” I knew I sounded like an asshole but I just couldn’t understand why he choose now to say all this. “Do you want to have a public relationship?”

“No, I just wanted to say it before everything feel apart.” Raising my eyebrow, he laughed finally letting me go to grab my face in his hands that were oddly hot and not sweaty. “Do you love me?”

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I thought about how our relationship has been in these past few years. We first met 7 years ago for a trainee project as the company was trying to recruit more, and since then it had all been sporadic meetings until he had debuted. He asked for me to be in his first music video as an extra and I had agreed seeing as how my schedule wasn’t full at the time. We became close after that and I watched him run through many relationships while I kept steady with only two real ones and a few flings disguised as hang outs. It’s only been two years since we started meeting like this only breaking it off whenever he had gotten himself into a new relationship, and during those times my heart ached when it shouldn’t.

I had abandoned my feelings for him when I saw how bad his breakups had gone, even a few making their way into the papers and online. I never wanted to be hurt like how he did them, so I told myself that that feeling wasn’t love. I had forced myself to believe I was projecting my feelings for someone else onto him and in the end, I hid that feeling for so long that whenever it comes back I can’t stomach it. And now out of all times, he’s saying that he’s in love with me after crushing my heart over and over again.

Why didn’t he say anything from the beginning? Why is he suddenly acting like Jiwon instead of the heartbreaker Bobby? Why is he doing this to me?

“I did at one point – I truly did.” His smile was as genuine as it would get causing him to let out this relieved sigh – why was he relieved?

“Then the feeling is mutual.” Taking his hands from my face, I pressed them into his chest showing that I wasn’t understanding any of this. “Let’s do what we always dreamed of doing.”

“Huh?” I was soon whisked off into his bedroom that I shared with him on many occasions but something about this one was different. “What is with the difficult way of speaking?”

I never got my answer instead spending the rest of the night with him whispering ‘I love you’ into every inch of my skin. I cried out of the fact that I had fallen in love with him all over again. I had fallen into the cycle of piecing my heart back together only to wait for it to be crushed. And with the moon as my witness, it was clear that this was going to end badly for me – this was going to finally destroy me.

(~*~)

Many months had passed since then, and he never texted or called me again. I didn’t think much of it as I was busy with work overseas knowing that the difference in time zones would make it hard for us to contact each other regularly. Returning to the hotel, I was resting in for the time being I noticed a black box with a red ribbon on it that held a card with my name written on it. Glancing around the room as if someone was in it, I shrugged rushing into the bathroom for a hot shower, ready to go to bed from the long day I had had. I had a photoshoot before the sun had broken through the horizon and a show right after meaning that I haven’t gotten a break all day. I even ate standing up.

I stayed inside until my whole body relaxed soon feeling like the water that was running down it. Leaving the bathroom with a robe on, I went into my luggage grabbing a pair of underwear as the out of place box had caught my attention once more. Maybe it’s a gift from the designer I worked with earlier? They usually send gifts to my hotel room instead of giving them to me in person. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I carefully undid the ribbon before taking off the lid to the box only for it to fall out of my hands a few seconds later. What I saw made my heart hurt more than it should have? I felt disgusting for having believed him when I shouldn’t have; I felt betrayed to the ultimate level of betrayal.

Inside of the box stood a mammogram card that had words on it I never thought I would see.

‘ _W_ _hen I’m by your side, the world sometimes plays a song for me…_

Mr. and Mrs. Kim

And

Mr. and Mrs. Lee

Invite you to share in the Joy of

The Marriage Uniting their Children

**_Kim Jiwon & Lee Hyelin_**’

That was all I could stomach to read before I was throwing the box across the room. Once it hit the wall more stuff fell out of it but I didn’t care anymore – my heartache was the only thing that mattered at this moment.

I cried while listening to the saddest songs I knew as that always helped me in these situations, only this time it was different kind of a pain. This was a pain that was going to rest heavily in my heart until someone could come and erase it for me and that wasn’t going to be easy. Sucking up my snot, I went to the floor where the now dented box laid, slowly picking up the pieces reading each one making my pain even worse. A knock on my door head me wondering if I should ignore it or not only for it to open a few minutes later showing my Agent. He looked ready to tear apart the world at seeing how broken I looked and felt causing me to give him a reassuring smile that didn’t reach my eyes.

“Clear my schedule for the 15th of next month. I have a wedding to attend.” He wanted to object but in the end he did what I asked, making me thank him until he left saying that I had to wake up early. “What does it even matter? Early or late, the feeling will always be the same.”

(~*~)

The wedding was a star-studded event and suddenly I felt as if I didn’t belong. I obviously was dressed better than majority of the people in here as I wore clothing from this new designer that I was going to collaborate with in less than a year. All eyes were on me – some were curious as to how we knew each other and others were glares that I ignored as they were just mad that they weren’t as popular as I am. Chuckling at my inner thoughts, I headed to the sign-in/gift table and handing over the present I spent a lot on, I smiled at her family members that I’ve never seen before. They clearly weren’t famous, and it seemed that she wasn’t either.

Entering the wedding hall, I sat on his side taking notice of how Junhoe stood on stage with a stoic expression. The moment I sat down our eyes met causing his own too soft at the fact that I had told him what had happened. I had arrived back in Korea only a week ago, and those that knew of our relationship had taken to calling me asking if I was okay. The only person I didn’t lie to was June as he always saw right through me. I told him about how I had drunk myself into a cry fit the moment I had gotten a break, tearing up my hotel room, along with refusing food taking pure solace in the alcohol that seemed to know me better than anyone else. Of course, I had gotten over myself a few days after, having gone back to my normal self as if nothing had ever happened. I wasn’t one to dwell on such things for long even though the pain was still there.

Waving at him, he gave me a small one back before the light had dimmed and the spotlights that lined the aisle had turned on. The host for the event introduced himself as an actor that was “close” to Bobby and after expressing how happy he was for the other he had finally gotten to the point – introducing the groom. He stood nice and tall in his tailored, well-fitting suit that had me clapping along with the others not wanting to be that person. He scanned the room until our eyes had connected causing me to force an even bigger smile than the one I already had on my face. It was clear that he hadn’t expected me to show up because who in their right mind would? But sadly, I wasn’t in my right mind and even though I was forcing my congratulations, I knew in a few months I’d be genuinely happy for him.

The bride who I had only saw in photos looked beautiful in her white dress that flowed around her as she made her way towards the man that made her smile wide. The moment they had joined hands, the room sat down as we listened to them proclaim their love for each other in such a storybook way that I felt I was dreaming. One of his singer friends, that wasn’t Junhoe, came out singing for the newly joined couple and the crowd loved it as much as the bride did. I didn’t join in on the festivities instead holding my hands tightly together while watching with passive expression. ‘This was going to be a long’ was the only thought I had on my mind for the rest of the ceremony.

When the reception came around, I took that as my cue to leave not finding it polite to mingle with their families, especially hers, considering the position I was put in. Fixing my clothes, I stood heading for the door only to be stopped by a hand grabbing my wrist. The hand was familiar as was the cologne he used. Why couldn’t he just let me leave in peace?

“I knew you’d come.” That was his usual greeting and it hurt a lot to hear it from him in this type of setting.

Opening my mouth to say something back, the bride had run up pressing herself into him with a smile that clearly didn’t reach her eyes. She doesn’t like me – that isn’t new. His hand fell from wrist causing me to nod with a bitter look because he knew that she didn’t like me and that was also clear.

“You’re that model, Song Yunhyeong, right?” Agreeing to her statement that posed in the form of a question, I waited for her next words. “I heard a lot about you.”

“I’m flattered, really.” I honestly couldn’t give a rat’s ass what she thought as I could buy her whole family if I wanted to. “It’s nice to finally met the girl who had stolen Bobby’s heart. You look a lot better in person.”

“Hyung!” Turning away from the two, I watched as Junhoe came rushing towards us as if he had important news. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Nodding, I allowed him to pull me away from the two who were surely to fight about my underhand compliment. We stopped by the door causing him to look around to make sure that we were alone. I don’t think anyone would care to hear what we said anyway.

“What did you want to talk about?” The urgency left his face showing that he used that old trick to get me away from them. “Oh, thanks. I’m leaving.”

“Wait! Can you give someone a ride?” My face turned up at his question over the sole fact that I don’t like other people in my person space. “Don’t worry, he just needs a ride because his car is getting fixed at the moment and I’m not leaving until late.”

“Okay, where is he?” Pointing at this guy with black hair and red roots, I stared quizzically as it was an odd hairstyle even for a model. “I think I saw him somewhere before.”

“He’s a famous up-and-coming director.” Nodding, even though that wasn’t it, I went along with his words not at all conscious of the eyes that watched me walk towards him. “His name is Kim Hanbin.”

“Mr. Kim, I heard that you need a ride.” Turning to look at me, he flashed me a quick smile with a nod that had me motioning for him to follow me.

Handing the valet my ticket, we waited without a word for my car to be brought and when it was I had told him to get in and not make a mess. It wasn’t like he was eating or anything but I just hate when my things get messy. He gave me direction to this bar on the other side of Seoul and if it wasn’t for my kind nature I would have told him to catch a taxi and pay the hefty fair. By the time we had made it, the sun had left the sky and the moon was back to hurt me once more.

Bidding him farewell, I was about to drive off only for him to invite me in for a drink. I should have declined but my schedule was free for the rest of the month as I had handled all of my business. Parking, I got out following him inside of the quant and cozy bar that looked different on the inside. Telling me to sit at a table, he went to the bar ordering for us causing me to take in his sluggish figure that I never noticed. The moon must hurt him as well. When he came back, I also took notice of the incoming mustache and beard that he didn’t even care to hide anymore.

“Tonight the moon is alone again.” His words shocked me as I didn’t think he had noticed. “It seems that the stars do not like the moon.”

“Just like me.” Whispering into my glass, I never thought that I’d be having a conversation with someone I had never met before. “I am the moon and the stars are the people that I thought cared for me.”

“You too must live clenching an empty heart.” Laughing at his words, I shrugged as that was only half of the problem.

“Holding onto sad memories.” Clinking our glasses together at our unidentified but shared sadness, the moon seemed a little less lonely tonight.


End file.
